YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
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