he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
