the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
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