took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Randomize