do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
