How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Randomize
