shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
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