She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
