instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize