He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
