shes about as inviting as chlamydia
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
