shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
