i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
