i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
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