I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
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