Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
