I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
