literally had 100 drinks last night.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
You're like the curious george of whores
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Randomize
