therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
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