On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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