so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize