But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize
