I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize