hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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