I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
