I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize