marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
