I bet he comes in French.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Randomize
