Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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