I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
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