She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize