Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
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