i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
never play flip cup with pint glasses
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
You dont lie about slip and slides
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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