people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
