I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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