to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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