brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
