Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize
