I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Just took my morning after pill in the library
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I lost the right to judge tonight
Randomize
