I am puke
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
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