I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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