2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Everything about him screamed your future.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
