That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
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