We should be called the Road Head Warriors
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
worst night to have a conscience
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
