Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize