and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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