The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
If I die, sorry about rent.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
