This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
What drink are we having for lunch?
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
