Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
