just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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